You laugh, you lose.

He wakes up as he’s being rushed through the hospital on a gurney by two nurses. “Am I in heaven?” asks the disoriented priest. “No” says one of the nurses. “We’re just taking a short cut through the children’s ward.”

It said “toilets closed”.

According to their own religion, even abstinence isn't 100% effective.

She said, “You may not feel anything from the waist down.” “Fair enough,” I replied, and felt her breasts.

He says the correct term is bulldozer operator.

I asked her how she could do such a thing and she said "He actually pays attention to me, he takes me out!" I replied, "That's because it's his job, honey."

She said she would never want to place that burden on me.. I said, honey that's the fifth time you've told me that.

The first week was the hardest